Tonight I was wrapping up Grayson in his swaddle blanket, getting ready to put him to bed. As he looked up at me I was overwhelmed by the desire to know what was going on in that little mind. I'm desperate for him to start talking - not because I want him to say "dada!" or so I can brag to everyone that he already speaks at a two-year-old level - but because I have a deep desire to communicate with him.
I want to know what he's thinking about. What he likes, what he doesn't like. I want to know what he has questions about, and I want to answer those questions (if I can). I want to know what he thinks is fun and funny (me, I hope!). I want to just talk with him about what he's thinking about at any given time because I have a deep longing to KNOW him.
Of course I can't help but make the connection between these new feelings I'm experiencing as a father and how they mirror on an infinitely small scale the feelings our Abba (Hebrew for Father, or more appropriately "daddy") must have for us.
I think God longs to know us, to communicate with us, to relate with us in the same way I long to do all of these things with Grayson. I'm AMAZED at how being a Father has helped me to realize not just more about God my Father but more about my role as His child.
So as I wait not-so-patiently for those first words and the inevitable flood of communication with my own son, I remember that I also have a Father who is waiting with infinite love and patience for His son to speak with Him.
Here I am, Abba.
- Tim B.